Tag Archives: Music

This became 'our' station

Getting around Istanbul

By staying in Sultanahmet, I was hoping we would cut down on transportation costs, spend less time in the backseat of a taxi and more time on our feet exploring the city. For the most part, our theory worked. And when we wanted to explore the other side, we would walk over to the nearest tram station, hop on the tram for 2 Turkish liras each and over the Golden Horn on the Galata Bridge to Kabataş (the last station on the line). We then have the option of taking the funicular (a cable car that runs like a metro) to Taksim or the ferry to the islands.

The public transportation system in Istanbul is quite straightforward and most of the touristy sites fall right next to a station. The trams are clean, fairly new and well-maintained. What we didn’t take into account, however, was the Eid Al-Adha holiday crowd. Middle Easterners swamped Istanbul, the European tourists were aplenty, and because of the public holiday, Turks themselves were out and about. The buses and trams were bursting at the seams. The ferries (a very common mean of transportation between the European and Asian side) looked like they were floating by some miracle; people were packed on that boat like sardines. And how I hate sardines…

On the first day of Eid al-Adha (Kurban Bayramı in Turkish), we set out to the famous Istiklal Street. We thought we would spend the day walking around, exploring the area and avoiding the historical and religious sites which I figured would be crowded. We were disappointed to see Istiklal Street practically empty and most of the shops closed.

When it looked like most of the stores weren’t opening, we hailed a taxi and asked him to take us to Forum Mall, Europe’s largest shopping mall. Let me just say that I’ve had several harrowing taxi experiences before, including cabs in New York City, Saudi Arabia and Cairo. The terror I felt that day, as our middle-aged cab driver zoomed around the highways, surpassed all the other experiences. My sister and I held on to dear life as the man put his foot on the accelerator and soared past buildings, between trucks and maneuvered the car on the edge of a mountain. I felt ill and tried to distract myself by taking out the camera to document the ride of my life – if I survived to blog about it, that is. My pictures were mostly blurry.

The ride of death was totally unnecessary, we soon found out, because the mall was closed. The driver neglected to tell us that everything opens at 1:30 pm on the first day of Eid and he insisted on driving us to another mall. He charged us over 100 TL ($56) and dropped off at Istaniye Park Mall, which was also closed until 1:30! We stood in the cold for almost 2 hours until the mall opened. I still haven’t forgiven that taxi driver.

We had one other transportation incident that left me cursing left and right, but other than that we were able to navigate our way around Istanbul safely and without any major problems. The trams and cable cars felt considerably safer than Paris and London, especially for two young women traveling alone.

And finally, the shoes that were made for walkin’. Can you guess which one’s mine?

A flamenco journey

I have 30 minutes

before the Sleep Aid kicks in and this blog turns into the Chronicles of a Spaced Out Kuwaiti Woman.

Have you been wondering where I’ve been? Please say yes and indulge my fantasy (the one where I believe that some people check my blog on a regular basis and freak out when I don’t post for a day or two). I’ve been a little busy lately and to be honest I haven’t been inspired to write. The weather’s lovely during the day but I’m cooped up in a tiny cubicle that stagnates even the most brilliant of minds. So I leave work and I don’t want to stare another screen. But I end up in front of my laptop anyway, because I just can’t seem to remember what people did before The Golden Internet Era. I google holiday packages, hotels, restaurants. And salivate sigh. I’ve been really stressed out lately, hence the lack of sleep and my reliance on these magical little blue pellets that help me catch some much-needed Zs. I tend to ramble when I’m stressed – have you noticed?  I feel like I just need to get away for a bit.

Guess what happened the other day! I was out for a late lunch/early dinner and I ran into a tall, attractive man. The End.

I’m kidding.

So, I was at a small restaurant, chatting with a friend and enjoying my food when I noticed a handsome man who looked vaguely familiar standing not far from my table. “Oh I know that guy,” I blurted out to my friend. Fortunately, I was too far away for him to hear me. I quickly remembered that we did not part on the best terms (professionally speaking) and I suspect the guy of slander, too.

Seeing him made me think of how gullible I’ve been in the past, giving everyone the benefit of the doubt. Wait, I’ making it sound like I learnt something and changed, when in fact I haven’t. I am still quick to trust people despite the many metaphorical blows that some malicious characters have dealt me. O those blows. They left me reeling. Ironically though, I don’t think this a bad guy, or that he was out to hurt me. I think he (like so many others) truly believe that the only way they can get ‘ahead’ is by lying and making others seem inferior. In the past few years, I’ve had my fair share of his type. I may still be occasionally deceived by them (because they can be talented actors!) but I know better than to take it personally.

So I saw him — took a minute to recall what had transpired between us — and got back to my scrumptious dessert. Moral of the story? Dessert can’t wait.

On a completely unrelated note, I went to a great flamenco guitar concert tonight. The theatre was packed, but here’s a picture I managed to take.

A flamenco journey

The music was bold, bright and warm. It sounded like a walk through the cobblestoned Seville on a crisp October night.

Ramblings and a song

I’m supposed to post daily in preparation for nanowrimo, but just the thought of writing something every day (novel, aside) scares me to death. And I know exactly why I’m terrified (hold on while I find my horn-rimmed glasses, people take me more seriously when I’m wearing them). So, now that I look more like Tina Fey (yeah, right) let tell you why blogging daily is such a dilemma.

It’s my *clears throat* deep-rooted, crippling  phobia of commitment – unfortunately, my phobia doesn’t have a fascinating name like coprastasophobia, the fear of constipation. For example, I practically get hives when I’m about to sign a contract. I feel like I’m giving up my freedom and handing my life over to my employer, like I’m entering a binding agreement I cannot break, like I’m Snow White knowingly biting that poisoned apple. I get very philosophical; I start conversing with The Universe. (I’m a little self-centered and easily distracted, so our conversations are brief, one-sided and about me. I do all the talking.) Maybe it’s because there was always something off about the contracts I’ve signed, none of them sounded just quite right. Maybe it’s because I haven’t found my dream job yet (read: professional ice-cream taster). The point is, I despise signing contracts.

But there are no contracts when it comes to blogging or taking part in nanowrimo, right? And so of course, I find other things to obsess about.  The moment I commit to writing something, I instantly set myself up for failure. Like with the blog, I kept thinking: how am I going to come up with something new to write every day? How will I ever have time? Who’s going to read it anyway? I’m my own worst critic. I still can’t believe I’ve had three blogs since 2004! What was I thinking  leaving imperfect pieces of writing on the Internet for everyone to see? *Shudders*

Yet here I am, despite all the negativity, still blogging. I push myself because I want to write more; I want constructive criticism and I want to record my thoughts, share my feelings and learn from others. I will try to post daily but if I don’t, you’ll let it slide, won’t you? Posts may be disconnected, hurried or dull. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Ok. That’s it. Anticlimactic, but that’s all I’ve got for now. *Taking off the glasses*

Ready for the song? It comes with a short story.

I was driving out of Kuwait City late last night, windows down, relishing the cool breeze. I was glad to be wearing a denim jacket! Yes… Summer. Is. Over.

It was the perfect weather for my favorite song by Adele. I had this on repeat:

It doesn’t take much

You have to really go out of your way to push me over the edge; to make my voice harden and my fists clinch in anger. And most people are aware of that, of how flexible I can be. I’m tolerant and forgiving – to a fault. It takes a lot for someone to lose my trust or respect because I have countless excuses lined up for why that person treated me the way they did. You’re so naive, my friends tell me when I recount a story, you have to stand up for yourself. Don’t let so-and-so walk all over you.

It’s great advice. Until they’re doing the walking-all-over-me thing, abusing my easy-going nature. It takes a lot for me to snap but lately I find myself losing patience quickly. I still avoid the confrontation, but something inside me just dissolves. I won’t even say “it dies” because it’s not so dramatic; I just slowly become apathetic, removing myself emotionally from the situation. I noticed that lately, when my trust is broken, it’s becoming more unlikely for me to forgive and forget. Am I finally growing up? Is this what grown ups do? Smile and nod despite the bitter grudges?

I know this post sounds like it’s spiraling into a dark abyss of self-pity and introspection but bear with me. The reason I say it takes a lot to push me over the edge is because I just realized that it doesn’t take much at all to make my day week. A few minutes ago I received a short phone call. “I just called to let you know that I really appreciate and value your friendship,” she said.

That’s all it took. A friend I’ve known for over ten years, whom I see sporadically at best, made me feel loved. Her phone call was like the autumn breeze I’ve been anxiously waiting for. I know it sounds cheesy but it’s the unexpectedness of the gesture and the sincerity that touched me. It also came from someone who didn’t know how glum I’ve been the past few days. I was caught off guard and so overcome with emotion that I can’t remember what she said exactly, but it felt like someone took my hand and told me that it’ll be OK.

I can’t even begin to explain how she renewed my faith in people and gave me a wake up call. Just when I had decided that I was through playing nice, she brought me back to my senses. I’ll probably be wary of people for a while, reading the signs I often ignored. But I won’t let it change who I am. My flexibility is not a weakness, it’s based on loyalty and good faith.

On  an unrelated note, there are clouds high in Kuwait’s sky today and the softest puff of fresh air. Could summer finally be on its way out?

This is just down the street from where I lived.

What I want to go back for?

Muddy Waters allegedly said, “I wanted to get out of Mississippi in the worst way. Go back? What I want to go back for?”

I moved to Mississippi in August, 2008 to teach Arabic at Jackson State University (as a Fulbright TA). By Thanksgiving I knew what Muddy Waters was talking about. I wanted to get out of Mississippi and never go back. Before leaving Kuwait, I had prepared myself for an adventure. This was going to be my first experience living away from home, and for a whole year! I decided that I was going to make the most of it: meet new people, explore new places, read Southern literature, try new food and basically live my life to the fullest.

A random photo I took during my first week.

Maybe I had high expectations but in a few weeks I started writing to my friends saying that I was not prepared for life in the Deep South. Without a car, I was completely cut off. I was stranded in the ghetto. The people I met were not friendly, the classes I took were mediocre and the activities arranged by the international program were too outdoorsy for me. My living arrangement (read: psychotic flatmate) probably aggravated my sense of despair.

Cooped up in my apartment, this was my view all day, every day.

Fate dealt me several blows during the first part of my Fulbright program. Office politics and the animosity between employees demotivated me. I became withdrawn and instead of making the most of my experience, I spent all my days online, chatting with friends back home and composing silly e-mails. I was a 21st century hermit. I’d go to campus, teach my classes, head back home and get online. Later in the evening, when everyone in Kuwait was fast asleep, I’d venture out of my apartment and walk to the gym where I’d work out for an hour then get back to the safety of my room. I had met a few international students and I we hung out almost on a daily basis, but they lived on campus and I didn’t and I knew better than to get too attached to them (they were all heading back to their own countries in December). And just when I was getting comfortable in my pitiful routine, Red Lobster changed my life! Wait, that’s pretty pathetic too.

Early in September, one of the employees coerced me into attending a luncheon at the Red Lobster – even though it was Ramadan and I was fasting. I can’t remember the details but she needed to parade the international teachers to a group of benevolent citizens who funded and supported exchange programs (hmm). I contemplated not going but I pushed myself because Ramadan is not just about fasting from food and drink but all about increasing one’s good deeds and being a better person. It was there that I met my friend S. (who I often refer to as my savior). I must have been so tired and hungry that I still can’t remember what I said to her that day. But apparently we exchanged e-mails! And I am so grateful we did.

A month later, S. got in touch with me and I think we met for the first time in November. S. plucked me out of my apartment where I was wallowing in self-pity and showed me Mississippi. She showed me the southern hospitality one reads and hears about. She talked to me about the rich literary tradition in her soft drawl, introduced me to her family and friends and by January all but adopted me!

This is just down the street from where I lived.

It was only after I saw Mississippi through her eyes that I grew to love it and tried to understand it. It was on our adventures that I finally lived up to the promises I made myself. I was meeting new people, having the most unexpected adventures, reading Eudora Welty and enjoying cup after cup of sweet tea. Although I wanted to get out of Mississippi in the worst way, I now yearn to go back. There are stories I want to hear and places I want to explore. As William Faulkner pointed out, “to understand the world, you must first understand a place like Mississippi.”

apple butter pecan goodness

Spiced everything

While September marks the end of summer and the beginning of autumn (fall) around the world, we barely notice the change here in Kuwait. To be honest, there is a slight drop in temperature, a decrease in sandstorms and that’s about it. It’s around late October that the weather plays nice and by November we start getting a crisp morning breeze and the occasional rain shower if we’re lucky – I may or may not be idealizing “autumn” in Kuwait.

Sadly, the leaves don’t change color (but that might be due to the lack of trees), but at least the markets flood with pumpkins, chestnuts, apples and pears. And all I want to do is bake/eat cinnamon-y apple muffins and spicy pear breads. I want to pick up a pumpkin spice latté as I drive around to work listening to my Rainy Day playlist.

I made these apple butter pecan muffins to kick off the season and I can’t wait to add this song to my Rainy Day playlist.

the good days

They call it “The Movie Capital of Mississippi”

The Ponder Heart, A Time to Kill, My Dog Skip, Oh Brother Where Art Thou are all movies I haven’t seen.

And they were filmed entirely in Canton, Mississippi.

On a surprisingly chilly day at the end of February (2009), my good friend Sarah drove us to this quaint little town to explore the famous Canton Square. It was like we drove right back into the 1950′s.

Apparently there’s a museum in Old Canton and a biannual Flea Market that attracts over a thousand vendors. We were there on a quiet weekend and it was like Canton was taking a nap.

We strolled around, wandering in and out of the antique stores and peering into a curtained window. We took some pictures – though I wish I took more, or had a better camera (I was using my sturdy Sony DSC-W120 at the time).

In 1950 Canton probably rocked to Bill Haley and His Comets.

In 2009 it was drowning in a stagnant pool of nostalgia.